At least we’ve weeded out half of the participants.

Just once, I’d like to hear somebody running for office talk and behave like a normal human being.

Just once, I’d like to have some incumbent stand up and say, “I’m so-and-so and I’ve represented you for (fill in figure) years and I’ve done the best I could. I couldn’t get you everything you wanted or I wanted, but I tried, I really tried.

“If there’s anything you don’t like about what I’ve done, let’s hear it, so I can explain why I did it that way. If you can’t think of any complaints offhand, I’d sure appreciate your vote, and I’ll try to keep right on looking out for your interests to the best of my ability.”

But no, the incumbents spout figures and double talk and claim credit for ideas and bills they had about as much to do with as Bill Clinton did with routing the terrorists during his two terms in office.

They are offering themselves up for yet another term, they say, as if it were a sacrifice, so they can finish all the great things they started or propose to start.

The challengers are no better.

Every single one of them, regardless of party, is for open government, a sensible approach to growth, a healthy balance between the environment and the need to provide jobs, affordable housing, health care for all, children’s needs, pursuing educational excellence and senior citizens’ concerns.

This is all said as if the incumbent didn’t give a rat’s behind about any of those things and all it takes to achieve them is to kick him or her out and bring in new blood.

Nobody ever comes clean on how much anything will cost, because they simply don’t know, or how impossible some of it will be to accomplish.

I’d like to hear one challenger say, “Folks, I’m running because this job that’s up for grabs is a heckuva good one, what with the salary, fringe benefits and power base to do something worthwhile, and it ought to be passed around occasionally. I’d like it to be my turn, and while I don’t know diddly-squat about some of this stuff the incumbent spouts off, he didn’t either when he first got it. I’m a quick learner so I’d appreciate it if you gave me a chance to prove that I can do it.”

People don’t really demand much of their politicians beyond sincerity and a willingness to listen to them. Listen to them. Listen to them. I can’t say that often enough. I have received a steady flow of letters through the years from Washingtonians frustrated with their inability to get answers from or even make contact with their public officials.

The best political pitch I ever heard was from a county sheriff.

When it came his turn to speak at the candidates’ forums, he’d get up and just raise hell about the lack of money to hire more deputies so he could protect the public.

He always acted as if he had a lifetime appointment and all the campaigning he ever did was for more money to do the job. His audiences were so mesmerized they probably were surprised to see his name on a ballot, just like the regular pols, who had to come up for a vote every so often.

I thought it was great. So did the voters. The guy never lost an election, served many years and retired by his own choice to the regrets of many of us, who would have liked to see him go on forever.

(Adele Ferguson can be reached at P.O. Box 69, Hansville, Wa., 98340.).